Global Warming Campaigners Welcome Improving Temperature Data

‘After years on the back foot, we’re finally gaining some traction’ say activists….

‘…but the healing ozone hole does not alter our underlying message’

‘Obviously the news that the ozone hole is healing dominated the last few days: it’s been the only thing people are talking about’.

‘The UK’s colder-than-usual June and first-half of July have also been a major issue for us – but then suddenly events turned on a dime yesterday, and we’re now hearing warnings of ‘killer heatwaves’ over the next 24 hours.

‘This is much more like it; the traditional photo of a packed Brighton beach, revellers in the Trafalgar Square fountains and panting dogs drinking from bowls put outside by shop owners.’

‘Our campaign for warmer temperatures has sometimes been controversial – but we defy anyone to say they prefer blizzards and snowdrifts to balmy days spent overlooking the sea from a luxury hotel room window with a sizzle-hot woman by your side.      Like in all those holiday adverts for places that nobody in their right mind would visit.  “In your dreams you’ve been to Kazachstan”.  Remember that one? Honestly…’

‘The message that goes out today to Greenpeace and all that lot is “talk to the hand.  Nobody cares about the environment.  Least of all Theresa-(let’s-abolish-DECC)-May’.