Cadbury Wispa Bars Are Being Stockpiled in Syria

UK Airport VAT Scam Garners a Wealth of Sensitive Data.

Why are these the UK’s biggest export to Syria?

Last year’s row over ‘airside’ boarding pass checks on shoppers at UK airports has had a big payoff for the intelligence services.

As a retired MI5 officer explained: ‘Most passengers assumed that showing their boarding pass when buying, say, a bottle of water at WHSmith was some kind of security check.  In fact it was simply a ruse to allow the shops to reclaim tax on items sold to those travelling outside the EU.’

‘However, in the process a huge amount of data has been amassed on which products are going where.  We know, for example, how many packets of Walkers Salt and Vinegar Crisps went via Heathrow to South Africa during July 2015.  And how many packets of condoms Gatwick shifted to sex tourists heading for Thailand in the run-up to Christmas 2014’.

So far so innocent.  But the information has also highlighted some disturbing data.  In particular, officials at major UK airports are reportedly ‘at a loss’ as to why more Cadbury Wispa Bars are going to Syria than to the USA, Russia, China and Australia combined.

Speaking on strict condition of anonymity, a store manager at Heathrow said ‘the record number of Wispas bought by one Syrian traveller is 47.  But 15-20 is not uncommon’.

‘It’s very worrying’ said an MoD spokesperson.  ‘We have a top team of scientists working on this to see if there are any ingredients in the chocolate bars that might – for example – cause an explosion if brought together in sufficient quantity.  A bit like ‘critical mass’ with uranium-238′.  Cadbury is giving us its full co-operation, and the best advice to consumers is to avoid Wispa Bars that are piled or grouped together in very large numbers’.