The 2015 introduction in England of a mandatory 5p charge for single-use plastic bags by large retailers was hailed as a great success by the environmental movement.  The number of bags used reportedly dropped by almost 90%. However, the ‘gentleman’s agreement’ that monies raised are passed on to charities is not mandatory – and some high street chains are suspected of pocketing some of the extra proceeds themselves. ‘We’ve heard of several very dubious practices’ said a spokesperson for Banbury-based green charity WRAP.  ‘These include incentive...

‘After years on the back foot, we’re finally gaining some traction’ say activists…. ‘Obviously the news that the ozone hole is healing dominated the last few days: it’s been the only thing people are talking about’. ‘The UK’s colder-than-usual June and first-half of July have also been a major issue for us – but then suddenly events turned on a dime yesterday, and we’re now hearing warnings of ‘killer heatwaves’ over the next 24 hours. ‘This is much more like it; the traditional photo of a packed Brighton beach,...

Green activists say cats, dogs and gerbils are ‘an environmental disaster hiding in plain sight’. The impact of methane emissions from cows are well-documented – but now campaigners are turning their attention closer to home, with a stinging attack on domestic pets. ‘They are increasingly an extension of their owners’ profligacy’, read a statement. ‘Dogs in particular are over-fed – while cats upset biodiversity and weaken the planet’s resilience to climate change by eating small birds.  These birds would otherwise be helping to control insect...

Effects of explosive methane emissions could undermine the efforts of global treaties. ‘MaxLax’ is certainly living up to its name.  The Swiss-developed drug can entirely purge a human’s digestive system in under three minutes. ‘This is the laser-guided missile of laxatives’, said the product’s press release just two weeks ago when it was launched on global markets – after three years of clinical trials. But not everyone is so impressed.  Greenpeace has called for a worldwide ban, saying that if MaxLax achieves the sales its makers forecast, it could lead to...

Following its recent bust-up with the BBC, The Met Office Announces the end of UK Weather Forecasts. The Met Office said today that it will cease production of UK weather forecasts, and concentrate instead on overseas markets. ‘All we ever hear from the public is moan, moan, moan; hurricane this, Michael Fish that..’ said a spokesman. ‘Well from now on British people can figure out for themselves what the weather is going to be like.  In India, for example, nobody cares if we get the start of monsoon season a bit wrong; everybody knows it’s coming and are much more...