The veteran actor is ‘overwhelmed and humbled’ by the appointment. ‘What a year!  First the OBE, then this’.  I am truly (Brian) Blessed’. ‘The selection process was extremely rigorous, with course work and exams on: The history of shouting in Western and Eastern cultures The legal status of shouting in the US Constitution (with particular reference to the Fifth Amendment) Applications of shouting in Quantum Physics, and The role of shouting in Shakespeare and cheesy 1980s science-fiction movie remakes (that was my favourite!)’. Blessed, a keen...

  ‘Natural extension to our product portfolio’ say Britain’s favourite over-populated narcissistic celeb couple. There is no doubting the pulling-power of the Beckham brand, with customers having queued for up to three weeks at garden centres around the country to have ‘first dibs’ on the dynamic duo’s latest creation. However, the much-anticipated selection of chairs and tables garnered mixed reactions from the public and media.  Some felt that the furniture had a certain naïve charm with its simple – almost utilitarian – design cues. Others tended more...

  A ‘rogue marker’ has been blamed for posting a completed colouring-in exam paper online. The paper – due to have been sat in three days time – is the country’s first to systematically test students’ ability to colour-in blank pictures.  It was to be a trial run for proposed additions to the National Curriculum in 2018. ‘This has wrecked several months’ hard work by our students’ said one teacher who preferred to remain anonymous. ‘Recently, there has been tremendous interest in colouring-in – among adults and children – as...