Disused Scottish Airfield Launches Bid to Become London’s Third Runway

These fields in Thurso could soon be the landing site for 747s and A380s

With Heathrow and Gatwick vying to add to London’s airport capacity, a new and unexpected hat has been thrown into the ring.

‘Thurso is an ideal choice for those wanting quick access to the heart of London’ a spokesman said.

‘It’s much closer than New York or Tokyo, and has nearby golf courses and oil rigs that Beijing can only dream of’.

‘Visitors will also appreciate the lack of congestion; the airfield has been unused since 1940 when it was accidentally demolished by the Army’.

‘The centrepiece of our proposal is to mow the lawns and water the flower-beds each month – weather permitting – and possibly also convert the airstrip from grass to tarmac.

‘On the catering front, Morag says she can probably make a few more microwave pizzas or fries for our overseas visitors.  There’s also a nearby library if customers want to borrow a book or learn Gaelic’.

But not everyone is so positive about the Scottish bid.  Former London Mayor Boris Johnson poured scorn on the idea of a location that ‘might as well be under water’.